Is James Bond Mr. Right?
In the film Casino Royale, James Bond walks out of the ocean, muscles wet and dripping as he poses just long enough for every man to envy him and every woman to be thankful that it isn’t another impossibly perfect Bond girl walking out of the water this time. But is, “I want to marry James Bond!” what women are really thinking?
Women’s magazines spend a lot of time talking about Mr. Right. They tell a woman if she has the right hair, clothes, shoes, make-up, sexual techniques and passes a quiz she can get and keep the right guy, get married, have kids, and be a good parent.
Men’s magazines could care less about all of that. The articles are totally laid out for a man to train to be an agent like Bond. Articles and advice include how to have the right car, the right gadgets, how to gamble, use weapons, play video games, fight and win, master a sport, travel and have the right look to get promoted at work, or of course, get some hot action from the variety of babes pictured in the magazine that all want him.
So what happens when James Bond has to settle down and raise a family? Like in any Bond film he gets betrayed before we can find out, but I suspect when Mr. Bond finally gets “whipped” it’s not a pretty sight. Suddenly he’s missing all of the tools required to make a home run smoothly, raise kids and keep his wife happy.
I can hear Mrs. Bond now, “Have you been out playing poker again while I have to bathe and put the kids to bed?” And, “How are we going to pay all of these speeding tickets now that you’ve lost your ‘00’ status? You know if you’d get up sooner you could get to appointments on time instead.”
I see Mr. Bond just thinking about eating, sleeping, or how much better Mrs. Bond looked when she was out with him having a martini or two before he got her so repeatedly pregnant, hormonal, and exhausted that he now hardly recognizes her.
James Bond is very cool. If I ever have an espionage issue, I’d love to have him on my side. But I’d rather have a man I can side with when it comes to the needs of our family than the spy who loved me, but didn’t know how. Maybe we can figure out how to make more of those: powerful men who chose to empower rather than overpower as a lifestyle.